Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

Tyler Labine, Alan Tudyk, Katrina Bowden, Alex Arsenault - A really funny film! Tucker and Dale (Tylen Labine and Alan Tudyk) have a cabin that's a real "fixer upper". They go there to do some "fixin' up". Along come some "College Kids" that think Tucker and Dale are trying to kill them. Nothing could be further from the truth. I especially liked Katrina Bowden (the secretary on "30 Rock"). Like I say, a real funny movie. I would rate it 5 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Death Race 2

Ving Rhames, Danny Trejo, Luke Goss, Tanit Phoenix - Not too distant future where cons take part in a death race. Hence the name of the movie. It was all right, but made for a much younger audience. A prequel to "Death Race", it tells the story of Frankenstein, one of the characters in the earlier movie. I would rate it 3 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Life During Wartime

Shirley Henderson, Allison Janney, Paul Reubens, Ally Sheedy, Charlotte Rampling - Directed by Todd Solondz - now same guy who did "Happiness". The same thing only different people. Weird! Peewee Herman was in it. Dryden Theatre type of movie. I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (2009 - R)

I Spit on Your Grave

Sarah Butler, Jeff Branson, Andrew Howard, Tracey Walter - An updated version. Tracey Walter was the only person I recognized. Typical story. A girl (Sarah Butler) goes up to a cabin. A bunch of boys (Jeff Branson, Andrew Howard, and others) happen upon her. You can guess where it goes next. The girl comes back and kills the boys. The end. Lots of gore. I would rate it 3 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - UR)

You Again

Kristen Bell, Jamie Lee Curtis, Sigourney Weaver, Betty White, Kristin Chenoweth, Dwayne Johnson, Cloris Leachman - A Walt Disney production. Enough said! It's about under-achiever who grows into a beautiful woman. Her brother is getting married to the most popular girl in school. Further hijinks prevail. I would rate it 2 1/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG)

Paranormal Activity 2

Katie Featherston, Micah Sloat, Brian Boland, Sprague Grayden, Molly Ephraim -- Wooden actors and a god-awful script make for a terrible offering. Number one was definitely better than number two - all though neither of them were that scary. PA2 is the sister of PA1. I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Middle Men

Luke Wilson, Giovanni Ribisi, James Caan, Kevin Pollak, Kelsey Grammer, Terry Crews, Robert Forster -- I love Luke Wilson. I like most of the stuff that he's acted in and this is no exception. It is based on a true story. Jack Harris (Luke Wilson) is a "Fixer". When a buddy of his needs some help with his nightclub, he goes out in Los Angeles and takes over the nightclub. While there, he gets wind a couple of fellows (Giovanni Ribisi and Gabriel Macht) that are having trouble with the Russian mob. He goes in and "Fixes" that, but he take over as controlling partner. It gets real interesting from there. I would rate it 5 out of 5 stars. (2009 - R)

Welcome to The Rileys

James Gandolfini, Kristen Stewart, Melissa Leo -- About a guy (James Gandolfini) who goes off to a plumbing supply convention in New Orleans and meets a hooker (Kristen Stewart) with a "heart of gold". His wife (Melissa Leo) comes down from Indianapolis, and in the end, they repair their broken relationship. Blah, blah, blah. Ally Sheedy played a bit part in it. Great actors - mediocre movie! I would rate it a 3 3/4 out of 5 stars. It kept me somewhat interested. (2010 - R)

Talhotblond

Thomas Montgomery, Ken Case (documentary) -- Just like "Catfish". Let me repeat: Never, ever start a relationship on the Internet with someone you don't know! Exactly like "Catfish" but there was murderer involved instead of somebody just being conned. I would give it a 3 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2009 - NR)

Monsters

Scoot McNairy, Whitney Able -- One of the most disappointing films I have seen in a long time. What's with the gas masks? And what is with the girl wearing short-shorts in a jungle environment. A guy (Scoot McNairy) tries to bring a girl (Whitney Able) to safety. They have to cross the "Infected Zone" to do so. The "Infected Zone" is where the monsters live. They get to watch an alien couple mating. The aliens are 100 feet tall. The only good shot of the alians is in the end. Disappointing and not that creepy. I would rate it a 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Good Bye Lenin

Daniel Bruhl, Kathrin Sass, Chulpan Khamatova, Florian Lukas (German) -- It was in the German with English subtitles. It took me about six hours to get through it ( I had to stop and read the subtitles), but I was glad I did. It was about a East Berliner (Daniel Bruhl) who is arrested during the fall of the East. His mother (Kathrin Sass) witnesses his arrest and as a heart attack. She is in a coma a long time. When she wakes up, he doesn't want to tell her that East Germany is no more. He sets up an elaborate rouge to fool her. This is the story about what happens. A fine film. I would give it a 4 out of 5 stars. (2003 - R)

American Cowslip

Ronnie Gene Blevins, Val Kilmer, Rip Torn, Diane Ladd, Cloris Leachman, Bruce Dern, Peter Falk, Priscilla Barnes, Hanna Hall, Josh Perry -- The greatest cast - a horrible movie. A heroine addicted, agoraphobic 30 year (Ronnie Gene Blevins) old finds solace in his garden. He and his neighbor (Rip Torn) compete for the "Most Beautiful Garden" in the neighborhood. One particular flower that he has, the American Cowslip, requires a lot of TLC. Take note of "The Retarded Policeman" (Josh Perry) as featured on YouTube. He is good. Sorry, Bob, but it was absolutely horrible! I would rate it 1 out of 5 stars. (2009 - R)

Pickup on South Street

Richard Widmark, Jean Peters, Thelma Ritter, Milburn Stone -- A grifter (Richard Widmark) steals a wallet with microfilm in it. The microfilm belongs to some communist agents. Darn those evil commie dupes. Disappointing as far as Film Noir goes. I would give it 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (1953 - NR)

Client 9: The Rise and Fall of Eliot Spitzer

Eliot Spitzer -- Like it says, the rise and fall of N.Y. Governor, Eliot Spitzer. It seemed kind of long (almost 2 hours), but it makes one realize that Clinton, Gingrich, Ensign, Edwards, and Sanford were caught doing the same stuff as Spitzer and were basically slapped on the wrist for their indiscretions. Go figure. I would rate it 4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Dogtooth

Christos Stergioglou, Aggeliki Papoulia, Mary Tsoni, Hristos Passalis (Greek) -- The weirdest film I ever saw. It's all Greek to me - literally. A man (Christos Stergioglou) and his wife live with three grown children. They are not allowed outside the fenced in yard. All day long they learn a new language. I quit watching it when his son (Hristos Passalis) killed the cat (about 45 minutes into the film). WEIRD! I understand that it is up for an Academy Award for best foreign film. Go figure. I would rate it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2009 - NC-17)

PS: 2/9/11 I finished "Dogtooth" today. A 110% weird.

Nowhere Boy

Aaron Johnson, Thomas Brodie Sangster, Sam Bell, Kristin Scott Thomas, Anne-Marie Duff -- About the teenage years of John Lennon (Aaron Johnson) including his getting together with Paul (Thomas Brodie Sangster) and George (Sam Bell). It was kind of interesting during the second half. I would give it 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2009 - R)

Let Me In

Chloe Grace Moretz, Kodi Smit-McPhee, Richard Jenkins, Elias Koteas -- A young female vampire (Chloe Grace Moretz) teaches a boy (Kodi Smit-McPhee) to say enough is enough were bullying is concerned. I like Chloe Grace Moretz, but this is the wrong movie for her. It went on forever. It should have been titled "Let Me Out" (of this movie). I would give it a 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Animal Kingdom

Guy Pearce, James Frencheville, Ben Mendelsohn, Jacki Weaver -- A seventeen year old named "J" goes to live with his maternal grandmother after his mother overdoses on heroine. The grandmother has some very nasty kids (bank robbers). Guy Pearce plays a cop. (He played in "L.A. Confidential" with Russell Crowe and Danny DeVito.) I thought it was an excellent movie. I would rate it 4 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Stone

Robert De Niro, Edward Norton, Milla Jovovich -- Waste of time. De Niro plays a prison shrink and Norton plays the one getting shrunk. Another movie about "feelings". I remember both of those guys played in "The Score". Unfortunately, I would not recommend "Stone". I would rate it 2 1/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Jack Goes Boating

Philip Seymour Hoffman, Amy Ryan, John Ortiz, Daphne Rubin-Vega -- The first half showed promise; the last half of movie absolutely sucked. Amy Ryan plays a much better part in "The Office". Don't rent this one. I would rate it a 2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

The American

George Clooney, a bunch of people that aren't as famous as George Clooney -- I didn't get it. I guess a weapons expert (George Clooney) is supposed to sell a gun to a "hit lady". I do know that it takes place in Italy. The rest of it is a mystery to me. I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Drawn Together - The Movie

Adam Carolla, Seth MacFarlane, Jess Harnell, Tara Strong, Cree Summer, Jack Plotnick (Animated) -- I really liked "Drawn Together", and so I assumed I would like the movie version. 'Tait so. Besides a bunch blue language, it had nothing to offer. I wish they would put it back on the air, but I am afraid that the series is dead. Oh well. I would rate it 3 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Cyrus

Jonah Hill, Marisa Tomie, John C. Reilly, Catherine Keener -- Some of the brightest names in comedy were not so bright here. Neither comedy nor tragedy; it went on for an hour and a half of virtually nothing. I was disappointed. It is about a guy (John C. Reilly) and a girl (Marisa Tomie), and the trouble they have with her son, Cyrus (Jonah Hill). I would rate it 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Despicable Me

Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Kristen Wiig, Will Arnett, Julie Andrews, Russell Brand, Miranda Cosgrove, Jemaine Clement, Jack McBrayer, Danny McBride, Mindy Kaling, Ken Jeong, Rob Huebel (Animated) -- The evel "Gru" (Steve Carell) and his Minions plan on stealing the moon. A worse evil doer, Vector (Jason Segel), plans on taking the moon for himself. Gru, his Minions, and the three girls he adopts, plan on stopping Vector. It was fun. I would rate it 4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG)

The Black Camel

Warner Oland, Bela Lugosi, Robert Young -- The oldest Chan in the book. It was made in 1931. It has to do with the murder of Shelah Fane. The suspicion points to her psychic advisor (Bela Lugosi). But the maid did it. It was Robert Young's first picture. I would rate it 2 1/4 out of 5 stars. (1931 - NR)

Infamous

Toby Jones, Sandra Bullock, Jeff Daniels, Sigourney Weaver, Peter Bogdanovich, Daniel Craig, Lee Pace, Hope Davis, Gwyneth Paltrow -- The story of Truman Capote (Toby Jones) in the years he was working on "In Cold Blood". I was particularly impressed with Sandra Bullock as Harper Lee and Jeff Daniels as Chief of Police in Holcomb, Kansas; Alvin "Foxy" Dewey. I didn't know that Bennett Cerf (Peter Bogdanovich) was at the executions of Smith (Daniel Craig) and Hickock (Lee Pace). Oh well, I guess you learn something new each day. I would rate it 4 out of 5 stars. (2006 - R)

Inception

Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen Page, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tom Berenger, Michael Caine, Lukas Haas -- Look, you either like the film very much, or you hate it. I liked it very much. It's about a guy who enters your dreams (with a group of people) and tries to get you to reveal your secrets to him. Heady stuff. You will have to see it to know what I mean. The only thing is after the movie I was confused about whether I was still in the movie or not. Like I say, you have to experience it for your self. I would still give it a 4 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Howl

James Franco, Jon Hamm, Mary-Louise Parker, Jeff Daniels, David Strathairn, Treat Williams, Bob Balaban -- The biography of "Beat Generation" poet Allen Ginsberg, and the time that his work, "Howl", was on trial for being for being obscene. Jon Hamm played the defense lawyer, David Strathairn was the prosecuting attorney, and Bob Balaban was the judge. All whole bunch of famous people played the witnesses. I would have turned it off after a half an hour but there were so many famous people that I kept on watching it. I now know all there is to know (unfortunately) about Allen Ginsberg. I would rate it 2 1/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

The Special Relationship

Micheal Sheen, Dennis Quaid, Hope Davis -- About the special relationship between the UK and the United States during the reign of Tony Blair. Half the movie was about Monica Lewinsky. I almost fell asleep. I would rate it 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - NR)

A Perfect World

Kevin Costner, Clint Eastwood, Laura Dern, T.J. Lowther, Bradley Whitford, Ray McKinnon, Bruce McGill, Linda Hart -- In the early 60's, a convict escapes (Kevin Costner) from prison and holds a little boy (T.J. Lowther) hostage. It was directed by Clint Eastwood (who also stars in the movie). Eastwood's movies are either terrific ("Changeling" and "Million Dollar Baby") or a disappointment ("Honkytonk Man" and "The Bridges of Madison County"). Unfortunately, I would have to put this in the latter category. About a half an hour too long. I would rate it 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. (1993 - R)

Eat Pray Love

Julia Roberts, James Franco, Billy Crudup, Javier Bardem -- Like watching paint dry. A woman goes to Bali. Then back home to New York. And then on to Italy, where she eats too much pasta. From there she goes to India and studies under some yogi. And finally back to Bali where she meets the love of her life. Definitely a chick flick. I would rate it 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Vampires Suck

Jenn Proske, Matt Lanter, Diedrich Bader, Ken Jeong, Dave Foley, Crista Flanagan, Ike Barinholtz, David DeLuise -- Every year, there has to be at least one comedy spoof. This year's edition is a take-off on the "Twilight" series. Like all those before (Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans, Scary Movie, Disaster Movie, and so on) it takes a funny idea, and runs it into the ground. Anyone older than 16 will find the movie boring. Obviously, I didn't like it. I would rate it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Northville Cemetery Massacre

No one that I had heard of before -- They said that Nick Nolte was in this one. I didn't see him, and there was no mention of him in the credits. However, the score was penned by Michael Nesmith (The Monkees). A woman gets raped by a cop. He tells her to implicate a motorcycle gang instead of him. Her father seeks vengeance on the motorcycle gang. It was a terrible movie. I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (1976 - R)

Behind That Curtain

E.L. Park, Boris Karloff, Warner Baxter -- The first "Chalie Chan" ever made. He is in it less than five minutes. A lawyer, hired by Sir George Mannering, is murdered before he gets to tell Sir George about a man that is carrying on with his niece. It looks like Col. John Beetham, his niece's husband, is the murderer. But come to find out, Eric Durand, the jilted lover, is the real murderer. I would rate it 2 3/4 out of 5 stars. (1929 - UR)

Catfish

Nev Schulman, Megan Faccio, Rel Schulman -- Never, never, never start a relationship on the intranet with someone you don't know. This documentary, by Ariel Schulman , follows his brother, Nev, and his attraction to the mysterious "Megan". I want you to see the movie, so I won't give anything away. Trust me, though, you will like it. I would rate it 5 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Somewhere

Stephen Dorff, Elle Fanning, Ellie Kemper, Benicio Del Toro -- Sofia Coppola can not make a movie. No way, no how! If her father, Francis, was not backing her up, no way this movie would have been produced. The film revolves around film star Johnny Marco (Stephen Dorff) and his tween daughter, Cleo (Elle Fanning). The things I got from it were: 1) He drives a Ferrari. 2) He plays "Guitar Hero" with his daughter. 3) At some point his daughter and he go to Italy. That's it! I kept on waiting for something to happen. It never did. Although Ellie Kemper was in it (she plays the latest receptionist in "The Office"). I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

Chasing the Green

Jeremy London, Ryan Hurst, William Devane -- Possibly the worst picture I have ever seen! The only actor of note was William Devane. It's a true story about two brothers and the cell phone business they started. Absolutely the worst acting I have seen, and the sets were absolute crap (in this scene, they were in their lawyers office and instead of law books there are Readers Digest Condensed Books on the bookshelf). Even William Devane couldn't pull this one out of the crapper. Jeremy London is currently in "Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew". He is a mess. If you don't know what I mean, the movie was crap! I rate it a 0 out of 5 stars. (2009 - NR)

easy A

Emma Stone, Thomas Haden Chuch, Patricia Clarkson, Amanda Bynes, Stanley Tucci, Lisa Kudrow, Malcolm McDowell, Fred Armisen -- An average girl (Emma Stone) lies about "doing it" with a gay guy and she becomes the "School Slut" (even though it is all just a lie). An hour and a half that I will never get back. I would rate it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Frenemy

Matthew Modine, Adam Baldwin, Zach Galifianakis, Callum Blue -- A really, really weird tale about a cop and some serial killers. It was an hour before I figured the plot out. I wouldn't recommend it to many people. For those of you who remember Matthew Modine in "Full Metal Jacket", Adam Baldwin in "My Bodyguard", and Zach Galifianakis in "Dinner for Smucks", it will be a real disappointment for you. Strangely interesting, nonetheless. I would rate it 3 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2009 - R)

Tiptoes

Kate Beckinsale, Matthew McConauchey, Gary Oldman, Patricia Arquette, Peter Dinklage, David Alan Grier, Debbie Lee Carrington -- About a man who carry's a secret with him - he comes from a family of little people. I can't understand why they had Gary Oldman as the guy's twin brother. Steven (Matthew McConauchey) is normal size, while his twin brother, Rolfe (Gary Oldman), is a little person. The rest of the cast is both normal size and little people. Steven gets Carol (Kate Beckinsale) pregnant. They have a son. He is a little person. Carol moves in with Rolfe. The End. Absolutely abysmal! I would rate it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2003 - R)

Devil

Bokeem Woodbine, Matt Craven, Chris Messina, Bojana Novakovic -- Written (but not directed) by M. Night Shyamalan. Five people in an elevator car. You know what happens next. I won't tell you the ending, but suffice it to say, the devil made him do it. I would give it 4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Micmacs

Dany Boon, Julie Ferrier, Dominique Pinon, Yolande Moreau -- A guy (Dany Boon) works in a video store in Paris. One day, a shooting happens right outside his building. He is involved with the crossfire. At the hospital, they decide his fate, and leave the bullet in his head, but he could die at any time. He takes refuge with a weird sort of junk collectors. Each one has something special that they do (one is a human calculator, one is a contortionist, one is a human cannonball, etc). He has the casing from the gun that tried to murder him, and a half dissolved landmine that his father tried to disarm when he was in the Army. By accident, he finds the two armament distributors right across the street from one and another. He devises a plan! I couldn't get into it right here (his plan is very involved), but it works. The only problem I had with it was it was in French. But I got through it! I would rate it 4 1/2 out of 5 stars. (I added a half a star for the visual effects.) (2009 - R)

2010: Moby Dick

Barry Bostwick, Renee O'Connor -- Where are Gregory Peck and Richard Basehart when you really need them! For those of you who don't remember, Barry Bostwick used to play the Mayor of New York City in the hit series "Spin City". Renee O'Connor played Gabrielle in the series, "Xena". This time Captain Ahab's ship, The Pequod, is a nuclear submarine and Moby Dick is a 600 foot whale. The sets are minimalist. Asylum Films brought you the epic movies "Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus", and "Mega Python vs Gatoroid". That being said, "Moby Dick" is so bad, that it is good. And, yes, as the soothsayer predicts in "Moby Dick" (the original Herman Melville novel), "All, all, all save one shall perish" . I would rate it 4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - NR)

The Kids Are All Right

Annette Bening, Julianna Moore, Mark Ruffalo, Mia Wasikowska, Josh Hutcherson -- Nic (Annette Bening) and Jules (Julianna Moore) play a lesbian couple with two teenage kids. The teens want to meet their real father (Mark Ruffalo), and arrange to do so. It gets complicated when the father sleeps with one of the mothers. All five of them are surprisingly good, and the soundtrack was great. Shut the front door! I would give it 3 3/4 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)

The Other Guys

Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg, Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson, Eva Mendez, Micheal Keaton, Rob Riggle, Steve Coogan, Anne Heche, Derek Jeter, Brooke Shields, Rosie Perez, Tracy Morgan, Ice-T -- I have never like Will Ferrell. As a matter of fact, I have only liked him one of his roles. That of Ashley Schaeffer in the HBO series "Eastbound and Down". I also hated him in "The Other Guys". Typical story about a couple of worthless bums who are NYPD cops. All of a sudden, a big case gets dropped in their laps. Further hijinks follow. I didn't think very much of it, and all the stars in the world wouldn't have picked this one up. I would give it a 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Owning Mahowny

Philip Seymour Hoffman, Minnie Driver, John Hurt -- A compulsive gambler has a job in a bank from which he steals over $10 million to feed his habit. A true story. It was okay, but neither Hoffman's or Driver's greatest work. Roger Ebert ranked it "one of 2003's best movies". I guess he was high from chemotherapy that day. I would rate it 3 out of 5 stars. (2003 - R)

Restrepo

The Americans name their Outposts after fallen comrades. Hence, Firebase Restrepo. It follows a year in the lives of the Army Second Platoon in the Korengal Valley in Afghanistan. (2010 - R)

Shrek Forever After

Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy, Antonio Banderas -- Thank God the fourth, and final, has been put to rest and I don't think there will any more Shrek movies! The first one was cute; the second one was a bit over the top; the third one was down right annoying; and so fourth one..... the fourth one...... the fourth one.....Awe skip it. I thought it was awful. I would give it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Dakota Fanning -- Be forewarned, any of you straight guys (and I consider myself a straight guy) knock back an Abien before you see this movie with your girlfriend. Teen angst! This one finds the vampires and the werewolves teaming up to fight the "Newbornes" (the newly crossed-over vampires). In each one of the Twilight Sagas, there is about five minutes of some awesome special effects (#1 was the baseball game, #2 was the werewolves, and #3 was the fight scene) surrounded by two hours of teen angst. I'm sorry, but I wouldn't recommend this one. I would rate it 2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - PG-13)

Cemetery Junction

Ricky Gervais, Ralph Fiennes, Emily Watson -- It tried to hard! I gave up on it after 45 minutes. A bunch of working stiffs in a place called Cemetery Junction. British comedy (maybe that's why it's so God awful). I would give it 1 1/2 out of 5 stars. (2010 - R)